Here Again

I'm back here again. Here to process the weight of my heart.

 My heart yells.
 I look away searching for something to justify the smile on my face.
I've perfected this smile to be louder than what I hear coming from within.
What have I done?
When did I drift from nurturing to torturing my own heart?
I look around and I'm surrounded by memories of the times I felt most loved.
Now it feels that the ghost of my once upon a time has robbed me of my value.